(This is an interview with Kytka Hilma-Jezek, another person I networked with through social media. The interview is on personal development, spirituality, and more. Her openness to share her experiences, positivity, and outlook on life are amazing. The first time I read this interview, I had to pause, reflect, and then re-read some of her answers…. it is that insightful. The interview is split into 2 parts because I did not want to do any editing and unintentionally miss some stuff.)
1. I think I first networked with you when I had signed up for an Anthony Robbins charity (I believe basket brigade) and then networked with you on Facebook. As many people have had their lives changed from Anthony Robbin’s tremendous work, can you tell me a little bit of how 1.) you learned of him & 2.) “Briefly”
describe the biggest impact how his philosophy and tools have impacted your life.
Well Josh, what many people don’t know is HOW I came to Tony Robbins. My entire life has involved personal development, but much of it had a more “spiritual” flavor and in my experience at the time, I thought Tony to be primarily a corporate, fortune 500 type coach and mentor. I had always tended to lean towards Marianne Williamson, Deepak Chopra, Wayne Dyer, Neale Donald Walsch, Eckard Tolle, and the world of peak performance coaching was something that I categorized as something for corporate folks and sales teams. That taught me a very important lesson in passing judgments without knowing all of the facts and details for myself. So, after we lost everything in Costa Rica and were deported and I ended up facing the grim reality of having to literally start over as a single mom, someone with no network, no contacts, no job, no home, no car, etc… I was devastated. My son wrote a 3 or 4 page letter to Tony saying basically this: “Tony, my mom is down. I have never seen her like this. All her life she is the pioneer, the radical, the one who lives the lessons, and this experience, I am afraid will kill her. She sits all day and night crying and has begun cutting herself. When I asked her if she wanted to die, she said there was no place for the pain that was so built up inside of her to go, so she cut herself to let it out.” Pretty extreme, isn’t it. But honestly, that is where I was at the time. And the worst part was, I could not find a reference for anyone who had been there before. I came back weighing 89 pounds, and all I had spent 43 years of my life building was taken away in one swoop. I lost over $2.5 million in assets, my marriage, my liberty for 59 days, my children for that time, my rhythm and daily routine – which as Waldorf Homeschooling parent is so important… I lost my home, my car, my friends, my community, my health… everything. So Zack wrote the letter and Tony’s personal assistant responded. Within days we were his special guests sitting with his platinum members at this UPW seminar. The experience of that was great, but the best part was that Tony wanted to meet the 16 year old boy who wrote the letter about his broken mother. And I gave him such a hard time… I recall bitching the whole way to Orlando telling my son “Of all the people to reach out to… Tony Robbins? Mr. Corporate? He is so NOT me – how can I relate to him son, how?”. Well, today I am eternally grateful that Tony extended his hand and listened to my sons cry for help. We got to meet Tony before the event, one on one – just me, Zachary and Tony and what I thought would be a 15 minute talk, turned out to be almost 3 hours of the most amazing and honest advice I have ever received in my life. Tony is a master at what he does – but more so because that is truly who he is – he cares. And I was so surprised that so much of his event was about the other things that most people don’t consider when they think of success. He shares so much about relationships, health, psychology, healing past wounds and moving on. He is an amazing man and I have to credit him and Zachary for saving my life. I would urge anyone who has not seen him live – forget the infomercials, forget the tapes and CDs and go see Tony live – the experience will truly shift your life in ways you didn’t know were possible. He is not a mentor, or a leader or a teacher – he is a force. How has he impacted my life – well, I suppose that he opened my eyes to everyone being so much more than what culture or society wants to pigeon hole them into. His spiritual lessons were right up there with the spiritual gurus… his relationship teachings were truly from the heart and REAL. He is an amazing human being.
2. Although personal development continues to grow in exposure, a lot of people seem to neglect it. Can you explain how personal development seminars, groups, or programs have helped you? How have you seen it help others? Why do you think people continue to disregard it?
I think people neglect it because, like myself a few years ago, people believe that “personal development” is only for a certain group. They don’t fully grasp the context of a “whole” existence. That without passion in your job, nothing else really works. That without a loving relationship, nothing else really works, that without deep healing and letting go of the past and baggage, nothing works, that without spiritual connection, nothing works, that without health and a well functioning organism known as your body, nothing works. So many people feel wealth in one area of their life, and this gives them a false sense of comfort that they are okay – but how many people do you know who are really and truly balanced in their lives with all of those areas in harmony? Very few and far between. Personal development is about that – about bringing balance into all of the areas of your life so that your entire life takes a quantum leap forward – and that realm is called living in true joy, happiness, gratitude. From that place things like the Law of Attraction become activated and life becomes easy, fun, good.
For me personally, I always tended to fragment out and separate things. Being a mom was a different persona I wore for my kids. Being a daughter was a persona I wore for my parents. I had a persona as a wife, and as a woman, at work, and at play… All of these masks we wear for so long, how many of us get lost and forget the true essence of who we really are? How many of us are so busy shifting between these roles, these masks – that we even have time to live as our true authentic selves? Again, few and far between. But people are waking up. They see that model doesn’t work. They wake up and they think “there has to be more than this”. They find themselves not being happy or satisfied with more – because the old model of “more”: no longer satisfies. This is the era of wholeness and that begins with us becoming whole within ourselves as individuals first. Only then can we collectively work on the global challenges. Since I have been back in the US, I have seen hundreds of lives personally influenced and changed for the better by personal development. I have seen people make quantum leaps and huge shifts, and they are happier – they live with purpose, and as Tony would say, with passion. Those who continue to disregard it will find themselves feeling though they have missed the boat, and <laugh> an image of Ebeneezer Scrooge comes to mind – they will look at the ghosts of their life past, and be overcome with regret. The best time for change in your life is NOW. Start where you are – don’t wait for circumstances to get better – they won’t. You have to make them better yourself. You have to take responsibility – and all of that responsibility is yours, and yours only. No one will come and “fix it” for you.
3. On Facebook, you continue to mention Reiki. I remember the first time I heard about it was in “Harmonic Wealth” by James Arthur Ray and immediately scheduled a session and was speechless of how it made me feel.
Ah James Ray. Yes, his Harmonic Wealth is a perfect example of what I was discussing. You know, James is famous for saying “balance is bogus” – he says that true wealth is having all of the components of your life in harmony, like a symphony where all of the beautiful music depends on each individual instrument, and that is so true. I am deeply saddened as to how the public responded to the tragic events in Sedona. But I have absolute faith that James will again rise and grow from this. A lesson I see in the whole thing is again, personal responsibility. It will be interesting to see where the media continues to take this and how he will respond to it all as it continues to unfold. As far as Reiki – it is energy work. Many people in the western world fail to understand that so many of these energy modalities have been practiced for thousands of years. They label it “new age” when in fact it is ancient wisdom that is finally re-appearing on the planet. I wanted my kids to be responsible for their own health. I am a firm believer in mind over matter – which placebo studies worldwide have evidenced to be true. So I wanted them to know that they have the power in their thoughts, to call upon the universe and ask for healing. At the time there was no book that clearly explained Reiki to children, so I wrote it. I have received hundreds of letters from Reiki Masters and parents worldwide singing praises for the book. I just wish it had greater exposure. I self published it in a workbook format and with some good redesign, I believe it would really top the charts. The information is very valuable. But I never really pushed it because, again, I wrote it for my own children… I am too busy living life in the now to do book launches. I figure when the time comes – the person whose passion it is to publish or promote books wants it, they’ll find me.
Can you tell me a little bit about your work and experience in Reiki and how it has changed you and others?
Although I am a Reiki Master, and I send Reiki to the planet and people who reach out to me, I primarily use it on myself and my children. Actually, the children are such pure conduits for the energy, they actually do more Reiki on me than I do on them. So my experience on a professional level is quite limited, though I did write the book, and I do know how the energy works. I am a firm believer in Reiki, as I am in all of the alternative healing modalities. By schooling I am actually a Doctor of Naturopathy, which I studied primarily for my own in depth understanding of all of those different healing modalities. But being totally unable to even imagine myself sitting in a wellness practice all day, I never practiced that either. I just study and practice that which I know I can use in my life – and when I get passionate about knowing something, I am in it 1000%.
4. I see you work for Jet Set Magazine which is targeted to the very affluent and high net worth individuals. What is it like to be working with such a select target clientele of entrepreneurs, visionaries, and thought leaders?
I primarily do marketing for the magazine, which is a nicer way of saying advertising sales. I like it because in the realm of personal development and peak performance, you tend to find the individuals who have taken their lives to that next level we keep hearing about. They have cracked the code and now they can afford the life of the “rich and famous” that so many dream about. Many of the business cards I receive from the interesting people that I meet at the events and seminars are the owners and CEO’s of some pretty affluent brands. If I like them, I talk to them about the magazine. If they don’t show an interest and they get their secretary to call me – then I figure that they are too “big” to really take a day to day interest and I don’t even follow up. Yes, I probably lose some business that way, but my life is not about the bottom line or my commission check – it is about enjoying the moment and the relationships I build along the way. So, like all “work” that I have performed in my life, it’s not full time. My life is my own, that is what I do full time. I am Kytka. Mom. Woman. Advocate. Writer, Speaker, Visionary. Pioneer, Entrepreneur… and I like it that way.
5. Films like “What the Bleep Do We Know” and “The Secret” have started a spiritual revolution across the world. For a very long time, there have been books such as “Think And Grow Rich”, “Science of the Mind”, “Science of Getting Rich”, “Science and Health”, etc. that have explored the concept we can express the reality we desire through the power of thought…
1. Can you tell me how you feel about this “new age” (I hate calling it that) spirituality and how it effects your personal development and growth?
Yes, I don’t much care for “New Age” either – again, new age = ancient wisdom. I feel very excited that these movies leaped out of the obscurity of some self-help section and made it to the mainstream, because the messages they carry are timeless messages that people need to hear. Especially at this time on the planet when things are developing at an insane pace. Sometimes I feel we are on the fast track to making ourselves extinct with all of this – and other times I celebrate that we are all blessed to be alive at this exciting time on the planet. We are truly living a miracle. Every day, miracles happen that we take for granted. Look at everything we can do in this century… it is amazing the quantum leap humanity is making right now. Speaking of films, a wonderful film I highly recommend is Barbara Marx Hubbard’s Humanity Ascending Series and Gregg Braden’s Fractal Time and The Science of Miracles. They are great to give you an idea of the shifts we are making collectively as the human species. On a more personal level, I love Deepak Chopra’s The Way of the Wizard: The Art of Spiritual Transformation and Debbie Ford’s The Shadow Effect. I would recommend books – but everyone is so busy these days, it’s hard enough to get people to commit to an hour and a half video!
If only people would slow down. That is the greatest lesson. SLOW DOWN. Stop even… stop and look around. I mean REALLY look around. And as you look around at your life ask yourself “what is wrong with this picture?”. Write down your thoughts… what isn’t working, what doesn’t feel right, what needs to be taken out of your life? We avoid all of this and decide instead to be busier so we don’t have to deal with it. But that doesn’t work. The truth ALWAYS comes out. In the end, our greatest challenge is in facing our own truth. Who are we? Why are we here? – You know… life’s greatest questions that no one has the answers to. Why? Here is the most greatest answer of all time – because it is not a group question! Because the answer for each human is as unique as the DNA running through their entire organism, and all of these tiny threads individually make up the collective of the whole. We keep trying to solve problems from the outside in – that won’t work. That is temporary, a band-aid… Problems are solved from the inside out.
My own growth is now what it has always been, only it is now that I am wise enough to realize that it has always been. Does that make sense? I thought I was spiritual, balanced, in harmony.. and then I lost it all. And I was mad. It shattered everything I thought my world was. And it was by losing “my world” that I learned what “my world” really is. It is hard to explain. You have to have the experience to fully grasp it – but more and more people are having and will have the experience. It is a part of our evolution. We are stripping off all of the bullshit and getting to our core., whether we want to or not.
2. Why do you think this type of teachings are gaining a lot of attention more than ever?
Because it is time. Because if we do not make a massive change, we will be extinct. Many thought leaders point to the galactic alignment. Ancient wisdom teachings foretold of this time. Mayans called it the end of time as we know it. But that is the measurement of the passing of time. So maybe our ideas of how a 24 hour day should be scheduled is over. I think that is a great thing. There is a huge difference between a schedule (which I see as rigid and non flexible) and a rhythm (which I see as a natural flow between events, like the tides or the procession of the sun.)
I think these teaching are gaining attention – or let’s just call it momentum – because it is a natural procession towards what is coming in 2012. John Major Jenkins, author of Maya Cosmogenesis 2012, who I met in Sarasota last year and who is a dear and lovely man believes this, and I quote:
“A door into the heart of space and time will open, the cosmos will be reborn or recreated and we will reach the Zero Point of the process – a moment of collective spiritual birth.” He believes that our basic orientations will be inverted. He says “On the level of human civilization, our basic assumptions and foundation values will be exposed, and we will have the opportunity to embrace values long since driven under the surface of our collective consciousness.”
So the desire for us to move so rapidly to learn about and re-discover our own power, to heal ourselves, to live a fulfilled life, etc are all about coming back to the ONEness of what and who we truly are.
(Dr. Kytka Hilmar-Jezek, or "Kit", as her friends affectionately call her, is dedicated to assisting you harness your full potential. Kit applies her expertise & credentials as a Dr. of Naturopathy, NLP Practitioner, Author, Personal Development Coach, Speaker, The Integration Expert, Reiki Master, Childbirth Educator, Waldorf Homeschooling Guru, Niche Marketing Queen and Serial Entrepreneur. She is an inspirational powerhouse; a mover and shaker who continuously challenges the status quo and walks her talk in all areas of her life…)